Thursday, July 29, 2010

New Home..

Even though we're not completely settled in yet, it's been great being in our new apartment. We're having to work around having Kynlee, so when she is sleeping, we are trying to clean and organize. We don't have our bed up here yet, so we are sleeping in the living room, which is kind of uncomfortable. But of course, Kynlee doesn't know the difference. I really like our new place, but I wish I would have looked around more and found a place with air conditioning. It never really occurred to me how much we would need it until she arrived. I have lived in an apartment without it before so I thought it wasn't going to be a big deal. I really worry about her though. We have a window unit in each room, but it doesn't provide the same relief. The doctors tell us to judge how to dress her based on what we are wearing. If we're comfortable then a baby is probably comfortable. Everytime I see a baby on tv or in pictures they are all bundled up, but here in the apartment we have her in just a onesie, and sometimes socks. Even though her body temperature has remained normal, I'm afraid she isn't as comfortable as she would be in warmer clothes. I would love to swaddle her, because she seems to like it, but it seems like it would be far to warm. I knew going into this, that motherhood would be accompanied by worry. But I hate not knowing exactly what to do for her when she needs something. I wish I had a pediatrician in the family because I feel like I go to everytime I have a question about something. Because of my constant researching (and help from doctors. I'm not completely relying in the internet to help me care for my newborn) I have learned that her nasal congestion is completely normal, and with saline drops and a nasal aspirator, it should clear up. I have also learned that when a newborn's fontanelle (the soft spot on top of her head) seems soft, it's not always because they are dehydrated. As long as she seems content, and she is having around 8 wet diapers, and 4-5 poopy diapers a day that she is fine. I seem to get worried over the simplest matters. Sometimes I find myself wishing she would get a little older already so I can stop worrying myself sick over SIDS. But motherhood is a learning process for me, and another thing I have to teach myself is to stop worrying so much. There will always be a little worry to every day, but hopefully I can learn to not let it get to me, and enjoy every day while she is this age, because I know she will be grown in the blink of an eye. 

Monday, July 26, 2010

We're moving back to Boone tomorrow!! I'm so excited to be moving in with my husband and sweet baby girl!!

Sunday, July 25, 2010

Catching up...

When I started this blog, my intention was to update it every other day or so. But being a mommy doesn't allow that type of freedom. I've had a hard time finding the time to update everyone, not only because I have Kynlee but because we have also been in the process of moving into our new apartment in Boone, and we've been out of town visiting Corey's side of the family. Anyways! Kynlee is now a little of 3 weeks old, and time is flying by fast! I'm glad she came early, because it gives me and Corey time to get settled into the idea of being parents before classes start back up. If it were up to me, I would love to take the semester off and spend all my time with her, but I know if I was to do that, I would never go back to school. I only have three semesters left, so even though its going to be very hard, I'm going to try to finish on time. I am dreading taking Kynlee to childcare though. I don't like being away from her for even an hour, I don't know how I'm going to handle an entire day away from her.  It's been great being at home, and having my mom for help if we need her, but Corey and I are very ready to be moved into our apartment. It's hard being married, with a child and still living with your mother. The only reason I'm living here this summer is because my doctor was in Asheville, and I could work at my old job as the manager of the Black Mountain Pool. So even though I don't want to start classes, I really want to be back in Boone....But Kynlee is doing great, last time we went to the doctor, which was 5 days ago, she weighed 7'4, which the doctor says is good. Being a mother is definitely the most exhausting, hardest thing I have ever done, but at the same time, it is also the most rewarding. It can be frustrating when she won't sleep at night, and when she wakes up to eat it's hard knowing I am the one who has to get up because I'm the one that has to nurse her. But at the same time, it's all worth it when I see her smile for a split second (even though smiling right now probably means she is passing gas) I would do anything for that little girl, and I absolutely love being a mother so far......  I'll try not to go weeks between my next post!

Saturday, July 10, 2010

Friday, July 9, 2010

Baby Kynlee continued...

Kynlee is a week old now, and so beautiful. When we took her to the doctor on Thursday, her pediatrician told us her jaundice had climbed quite high to 18. So they told us to put her on a Biliblanket which will give her phototherapy to help break up the bilirubin that her body is having a hard time breaking down. It's been really hard for me to have her on the blanket because all I want to do is cuddle her but we have to have her on that at all times except when she is feeding or getting a diaper change. Look at that, I sound like a mom already! The whole time Kynlee was cooking in my oven I was so nervous about how I was going to handle motherhood. I was so nervous her first night, and I was terrified to be left alone with her. My mom had taken a week of work to help us take care of her the first week. But it became pretty apparent that we wouldn't need. Except for the first night, everything started to come so easily to me. Taking care of her seemed so natural. Everyone says mother hood comes so naturally, but I never really believed it because I didn't think I was capable of keeping something so fragile alive. My amazing husband is one reason why taking care of her is so easy. Some dads might shove the responsibility on the mother, but he has been there the entire time, and gotten as little sleep as me. Okay, maybe he has gotten a little more sleep than me, but that's not saying much! I don't want to wish our time away and make her grow up quickly, but I am so excited to see her grow up. I am especially excited to see Corey continue to grow as a father. I have already seen a huge difference in how he views his life, and he has only been a dad for a week. I love him so much, and I love our little family that we have started. I am having such an amazing life so far. I'm hoping it can only get better from here. 

Thursday, July 8, 2010

Baby Kynlee is Here!!!

It has been forever since I have updated my blog, but I'm sure everyone can figure out why. Kynlee decided to make an appearance 3 weeks early. I had a feeling she would be early, but not this early. Last Thursday, July 1st, I called my doctor because things were just feeling weird, and she decided to have me come in the get checked. We weren't expecting what she told us. Apparently, my water had partially ruptured the night before, and my doctor wanted to send me to labor and delivery to induce me to prevent the spread of infection. Corey was supposed to go to work that night, and my last day of work wasn't supposed to be until the next week, we never imagined that she would be coming so early. We weren't even packed for the hospital yet, so we went home to pack our bags as quickly as possible. I hadn't showered, so of course I took the time to get in the shower and dry my hair, then pack and put the car seat in the car, it was so frantic. We got to the hospital about 7pm, and after 7 tries at putting an IV in my arm, was induced with pitocin about an hour later. I was given some medicine to help me sleep, but hours later I was checked by the nurse and didn't sleep a wink, so I was given another dose, but that didn't help either. I don't know if I was anxious or uncomfortable with all of the wires that I was hooked up to. I was feeling slight contractions over night, but never anything severe. The next day was about the same as the night before. Corey was telling me when I was having contractions because I wasn't feeling anything. I was always so terrified of getting pitocin because I heard how terrible it makes labor, but after 18 hours I didn't even dilate, and contractions never got stronger, so they decided to give me a c-section because of the increased risk of infection to the baby. I was so nervous to have a cesarean because of the fact that my stomach would be cut wide open while I was conscious. When they took me into the room, it was exactly like it looks on tv and in the movies. It was cold, and everyone looked the exact same in the surgical gear. It took everything I had not to freak out when I was getting my spinal block, especially because a student training for her masters was giving it to me. I finally calmed down when Corey walked in. After about 10 minutes, the nurse standing next to me told me she would be here in about 30 seconds. I can't describe how anxious I was. This is going to sound weird to some people, but even though I took the pregnancy test, saw the ultrasound, heard the heartbeat, and saw my stomach grow, I still had a hard time imagining that there was a tiny human being growing inside of me. I just knew I was going to get to the hospital and the doctors would give me strange looks because there was never really a baby at all. But when they when I heard her cry, and they showed her to me over the sheet, it all hit me and seemed so real. I've never been so happy, it's like nothing I could ever describe. It was so funny to see Corey, he cried more than Kynlee did. When they were checking her and stitching me back up, I was finally hit with a wave of exhaustion. I was fighting sleep while they finished up on the operating table. They took us back to the recovery room, and I had to fight everything in me to stay awake. They kept monitoring when I got feeling back in my legs, and they showed me how to nurse her for the first time, all while I was trying to stay awake. We were taken up the mother/baby unit around 8:15. Visiting hours ended at 8:30 so of course the family wanted to see her before they had to leave, and we had to have our education done by the nurse, then Kynlee was given a bath. Finally around 2:30 the nurse left us to get some sleep. You would think after 24 hours of no sleep I would pass out, but I was so scared of being left with a newborn it was so hard to sleep. I have never even held a baby, and there we were left alone with no experience and a little life to take care of. We dozed in and out, but were stirred awake with every little sound or movement. Finally 9am came, and our parents were allowed to come back in making us feel a lot less nervous. But by that point I had gone without sleep since Wednesday night, and everytime I tried to take a nap I was too exhausted to sleep. By the end of that night I was able to get up and walk around just a little, and love on my baby girl. I was discharged on Monday, but Kynlee had lost 11.5% of her birth weight so they wanted to keep her over night, and we were allowed to stay with her. Finally on Tuesday, after 5 days of being in the hospital, we were allowed to go home. It's been amazing having her here. It was also amazing taking a huge nap after getting about 12 hours of sleep in 5 days. This is such a long post, and my baby girl is demanding I feed her so I will continue to update about our past week a little later tonight =)


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